Sabbath Devotional :: A Loving Vigil

Siobhan Owen — *Ar Hyd y Nos / All Through the Night — Songs of Praise*

My ancestors immigrated to Salt Lake City from Wales in the 1850s. One of my first forays into family history was learning about the nation of my ancestors. As a freshman at BYU, I took a Welsh language class on a whim. My professor was an expert in the history of early Latter-day Saints in Wales and knew much more about my family than I did. His stories about MY ancestors still inspire me. I learned that Welsh people love to sing together — at church and pubs and rugby games and everywhere else. So as part of our class, we sang Welsh folk songs. I regret to tell you that the songs make up most of what I remember from my class.

When my kids were little, I sang several little Welsh folk songs as lullabies. My favorite is All Through the Night, which I would sing in both English and Welsh. In Welsh it’s Ar Hyd y Nos, and my daughter would often mix up the two titles and ask me to sing “All through the nose.”

Sleep, my child, and peace attend thee all through the night.

Guardian angels God will send thee all through the night.

Softly now the hours are creeping

Hill and vale in slumber sleeping

I, my loving vigil keeping all through the night.

I love the lyrics, especially the idea that I am keeping a loving vigil over my children. My personal parenting goals were to be interactive and responsive. I wanted my children to know that I was available, and I would come to them if they needed me. I homeschooled and served in primary (sigh) and felt like I spent every minute with them. I thought I was keeping a loving vigil. I still think that when I’m waiting for my son to get home from a date, when I’m texting my adult children to see if they are doing okay, when I’m going to parent-teacher conference, when I’m trying to get my teenage daughter to talk to me, and especially when I pray, that I am keeping a loving vigil over my children.

Some years ago, I learned the lyrics for a slightly different translation of All Through the Night. The last line changed from “I, my loving vigil keeping” to “God, His loving vigil keeping all through the night.”

That change — from I to God — is powerful. Despite my best efforts I am limited by my mortal human weakness. God loves my children with a perfect, eternal love, and his watch care over them reflects that.

But sometimes I wonder, if God is keeping a loving vigil, why isn’t he intervening more? Like Joseph Smith, I have cried out, “Where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place?” (I am not nearly that poetic in my own prayers.) Recently, as I prayed in desperation, I remembered an experience from when my oldest son was about ten.

He had decided to start reading the scriptures on his own, and, naturally, thought he’d start with the book of Isaiah. Late one night, as I walked by his bedroom (keeping my loving vigil) I saw that he was still up with a book. I assumed he was caught up in Harry Potter and went in to tell him to go to sleep. He looked up at me, his eyes glowing with awe and inspiration. He was not reading Harry Potter; he was reading Isaiah. He said, “Mom, listen to this:

“Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.” (Isaiah 49:15-16)

Of course, as a child he didn’t really understand what that passage means but he felt the spirit very strongly. I asked him some questions and we talked a little about the beautiful doctrine contained in those verses. After that — for years — whenever it was his turn to share a scripture during Family Home Evening, he chose this passage. It became the foundation of his testimony.

I have tried to keep a loving vigil and I am sure I could never forget my children. Isaiah reminds me that I’m not alone in this. My loving vigil can never compare to Christ’s, who has graven my children upon the palms of his hands. God is keeping vigil. I can let him. I can yoke myself to the Savior and become his partner. I can trust in his abiding love and saving grace. And I can see his hand gently guiding my children in ways that astound me even if he isn’t intervening in the way I would have chosen.

“That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.” (Ephesians 3:17-19)

In the version of the song linked above, sung by Siobhan Owen, the English lyrics are slightly different from either of the versions I know.